Completely stressed out but so Zen at the same time. I always seem to get these moments of extreme clarity and peace. I have a case presentation tomorrow and i’m not prepared, at all. But I don’t seem to care although it’s 20% of my grade. Also, midterms on Thursday and Saturday for marketing and biz law respectively.
Tried a cleansing oil recently and it absolutely ruined my skin. I have 4 cysts and about 5 small pimples right now and it’s really painful and horrible. Hope they’ll go away soon enough. Skin hasn’t been this bad since before isotret, so I called for a derm appointment today. And they told me to wait 6 weeks. Six weeks waiting list. Seriously, can my derm work more than 3 half-days a week. I NEED HELP.
But strangely, I don’t seem to care very much about the hard lumps under my skin right now. Feel very peaceful and I-don’t-give-a-fuck about a lot of (most) things now. Feeling very grown up and normal recently, but I don’t seem to care much about anything right now. Considering my dire situation re: GPA/midterms, slightly worrying, but I seriously can’t be bothered.
Completely exhausted every single day. Practices run so late and days start so early. I spend more time in school than at home. Every day, is just a blur of faces and words flowing over me in class while I feel my brain floating around in the air. Today’s meeting was stressful, exhilarating and surprising at the same time. We have to present tomorrow and today was the first time we actually looked at the question properly and came up with coherent answers. I had the more neuron activity in those 2 hours then in the year so far.
Its 10pm and I’m ready for bed.
